What is beauty? I don’t mean what magazines and social media class as beauty, I mean real inner-beauty? The beauty that’s transcendental. Timeless…
I have had so many times when I have looked in the mirror and thought “I am so ugly” “I am so fat” and the all-time favourite “I hate myself”.
Too many times we have fallen victim to the insurmountable pressures of society in regards to how we should look. We cannot realistically live up to these standards. We fail repeatedly. These failures manifest in various forms: starvation, dieting, anorexia, etc.
This is not to say people only have issues with weight, the issues of not knowing our own beauty can concern our race, our gender, whether we have a disability or a medical condition, etc.
I personally have had a few failures: gym and exercise regimes; I have tried every diet going; have even dieted to the point of starvation… At one point, I would literally eat very little and then weigh myself, and if I put on any weight I would not eat.
It is an ongoing struggle, everyday is a new challenge. I could feel amazing one day and the next, I could have – what I call – an “ugly day”
My friends and loved ones say I am being silly (because they think I’m “beautiful”) but my mother taught me this: if you don’t love yourself, then nobody can love you. I take this to mean that, if you don’t love yourself, flaws and all (no one is perfect), this will show, in the way you dress, the way you carry yourself, personal hygiene, relationships you engage in. It’s all an illustration of your love for yourself. If you love yourself, you will take care regarding how you dress. If you love yourself, you will walk with your head held high. If you love yourself, you will get up everyday and shower and brush your teeth, etc. If you love yourself, you will only preserve uplifting, respectful relationships. In other words, you will be number 1, you cannot love nor take care of others if you’ve not done the same for yourself.
So I will be honest, I am still very much in the midst of my journey to self-love. I have good and bad days. I constantly compare myself to other people, putting myself down… I know literally every person on this planet has something they either don’t like or would want to improve, but at some point we have to stop, look in the mirror and say “I know I’m not perfect, but I’m me. And I am loved, I have people who care about me. I know my love for myself is inconsistent, but the love I feel from family, friends, a significant other will encourage me to see what they see and love myself completely”.
It is not about what we look like, it is essentially about the person we are inside. Looks are not an indication of the person we are, nor will they ever be.
I don’t care to hear your opinions if they are negative, life is already negative enough. Only positive thoughts, hearts and minds.
This is my testimony to my struggle, to my journey of self-love, to my real inner-beauty. I am still going and I am not stopping until I get there.
We are all beautiful people, let us not forget. No matter if we are: tall, short, thick, thin, black, white, Asian, male, female, wear make up, no make up, dyslexic, a chronic illness sufferer, etc.
“Beauty isn’t visible; I don’t know why people think it is. Perhaps because at times there are physical manifestations suggesting beauty exists in a person, but don’t be fooled. Beauty isn’t the packaging, it’s the treasure wrapped up inside.” Richelle E. Goodrich
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